Eyes Wide Shut: Staring At Our Phones

Everywhere you look, no one is looking. We’ve become a nation of bowed heads, hunched over glowing rectangles, thumbs dancing like we’re training for an Olympic texting event. At bus stops, in restaurants, in bed—our phones are the first thing we greet in the morning and the last thing we see at night. Somewhere along the way, our devices stopped being tools and became lifelines, security blankets, and let’s be honest, our best friends. But if we looked up for a minute, would we even know what to do with all that empty space in our hands?

There was once a time when people walked down the street and looked at the trees, the sky, adored the beautiful flowers, and maybe even the faces of strangers. I often scare people when I walk around smiling and saying hello to everyone. Some are shocked that someone is greeting them, but others look fearful and move as fast as they can after bumping into me or others and they never apolgise. Today, most of us shuffle along like extras in a zombie film, heads tilted at a permanent 45-degree angle, eyes wide shut to the real world, but laser locked onto glowing screens. The smartphone has become our favourite pacifier, distraction device, and uninvited dinner guest.

We all like convincing ourselves that we are just checking a message or seeing what time it is, instead of looking at our watches. Let's be honest, how often have you opened your phone only to realise, ten minutes later that you have been watching videos of a raccoon stealing cat food or a stranger making a cake shaped like a shoe? We don't always control our mobile devices. Too often, they usually control us. Many of my friends share with me that it's FOMO, or the fear of missing out. Missing out on what -- I have no idea.

As a young boy, my mother taught me and my siblings to always look at someone when talking to them or simply saying 'good morning or good evening' to others. She often stressed that eye contact was necessary for being able to decipher if someone was honest or a liar. I often wonder how we got here. Smart phones promised us freedom, information at our fingertips, connection to loved ones and friends anywhere, or anytime. What we got was a new kind of leash, dopamine driven notifications, endless feeds, and a cultural shift where silence feels unbearable unless we are scrolling. Waiting in line at the supermarket or post office, riding a bus, or even walking the dog, we can't stand still without our glowing rectangle devices in our hands.

Tell me, was making genuine eye contact with another person taught to you? It's awkward, but an essential human skill, even in the year 2025. It's on the endangered list. We have traded nods and hellos for thumbs tapping 'likes'. Families sit at dinner tables or in restaurants together in total silence, each one absorbed in their own private screen. Parents, grandparents, children, and even toddlers are attached to their phones. Soon, if not already, our dogs and cats will start using them as a distraction until their owners return home from work or from a quick shower. Asking a stranger for directions feels almost ancient now because, really, who needs kindness when you've got Google Maps on your phone?

Several nights ago, I exited a tram, but felt confused about the correct route home. I tried using my phone to ascertain my location, but it was useless. I watched several people walk by as they stared at their phones or had earbuds in their ears listening to music or maybe a book. Finally, I stopped one guy who pulled his earbuds out and helped me to get my bearings. It surprised me that he was very nice and reminded me not to judge someone without knowing more about them. Another lesson in life slapping me in the face.

The lesson reminded me that phones are extraordinary tools. They connect us, inform us, and give us a voice. Without them, many of us would be lost literally and figuratively. The issue isn't the technology itself. It's how easily we forget that the phone is a tool, not the main event or a good friend. We are like kids who discovered the cookie jar or mom’s secret jar of chocolate treats and never learned when to stop.

So here is the challenge of the day - Look up. Put your phone down for a few moments and notice what's happening around you. It could be the laughter of a friend, someone wearing a beautiful outfit or colour, real human interaction, the smell of coffee in the air or the delicious aroma of Italian food. These things don't buzz or ding, but they matter. Why? Because the truth is, life isn't lived inside our phones, it's happening all around us. If we keep walking with our eyes wide shut, staring at our screens, we may risk missing the very moments that make life worth living. Today, tomorrow, or next week, try not looking at your phone at one meal, one walk, one commute, while shopping for food, or walking your dog. Try to start noticing what you see, hear, smell, and feel. There is so much beauty all around us.